After a week of Theology we have...

JIM PAULSON QUOTES!!

Yet another way Jim Paulson has to humble himself--buying a Bible with large print.

(About whiteboard markers) Blue is starting to lose it, purple... purple is still juicy, brown starts off promising.

I had to write their ages down cause they keep changing...

I’m a pro at muddying the waters. Let me take the clarity and confuse it all I can.

I started blogging to tell the great stories of my life and I told about 15 stories and then I ran out of life.

You could have little, sexually mature Brontosauruses running around...

Thanks for nodding, cause I confused myself even with my musings.

I say it until I get bored, so I just imagine how you feel.

Good, banging-your-head-against-the-wall, tempted-to-choke-your-neighbor kind of fun stuff coming up this afternoon.

I am willing to be your punching bag, guinea pig, test case, whatever.

I know I’m throwing something flaky at ya here in the waning hours of the day.

Angels were having babies with human women. I wanted to freak you out at least once more today.

How do you take this and put it in your pipe and smoke it? (followed by...)

Forgive me for the tobacco, anything else you might wanna smoke allusions... [speaking to himself] No BC jokes, no BC jokes.

For example, someone taking a Tarzan swing into the ocean, that to me is “a sin leading to death” if you are talking about physical death.

God will have a visible backside because that’s what Moses saw... I knew that would come out wrong.

I don’t know why we need a king. I’m just enjoying posing the question.

I’m too break-minded. It’s my people pleasing nature. They’re paying all this money to have me come out here and tell them they have a break.

I said that so enthusiastically that death got a cheer!

I can’t even say it cute, so let me just say it... stupid.

I should have lightened up and sprinkled...